Take 5000000000 - Operation lose this weight

I don't care how many times I fail I'm going to get this weight off.

All I'm saying is my goals for this coming week !!

1. Full Week of Jillian 
2. Back on MyFitnessPal - recording every meal not just downloading the app
3. 1 sweet/non clean eating treat a day (moderation) 
4. No eating after 8:30pm 

UPDATED GOALS!

When I first started blogging I had created a GOALS page. And as I reflect on what I have accomplished I think it is time to revamp and hopefully ignite some fire in me again. 


BEFORE

1. Try a new fitness activity every month (i.e. kickboxing, cycling, hot yoga, anything else I find in the area) SEMI DONE- BOOTCAMP
2. Try a Pinterest recipe or workout weekly!!  
3. Fit into my Watch the Throne T-shirt  (a little tight but fits)
4. Color Run 
5. Complete 2nd 5k by the end of the summer  (not official race but for myself)
6. Go down a bra size (current: 38B goal: 36B)
7. Learn how to swim
8. Become intermediate in yoga
9. Fit into a size 10/12 jeans (pants)

AFTER (Let's end 2013 with a BANG!) 

1. 10-12 lbs  by Nov- December (specifically the last dress fitting) (5-6 lbs by Oct. 12)  
2. 10 min mile; 5k in 30-35 mins. 
3. Complete 10k (organized or by myself) 
4. Do yoga for a FULL MONTH 
5. ABS! & TONE ARMS & SQUATS! SQUATS! (more circuit training) 
6. Fit better in my Watch the Throne T-shirt 
7. Fit into size 10 jeans! 

With that being said my gym session was awesome last night! did some abs before I ran then after I hit a mile decided I was going to do arms while walking on incline! best decision EVER! I was dripping by the end of 26mins! 

always appropriate! 

Reality Check

I looked at the date and realized I haven't written a post since AUGUST 27! Lord have mercy.. I have dropped the ball.  

So reality hit me HARD yesterday! I decided to finally face my demons.. and step on the scale. For the last month and some change I have ate what I wanted with some moderation and running 2-3 times a week. Of course I was maintaining but slowly eating what I wanted became more frequent- so thankfully the damage was gaining ONLY 3lbs. I'm so happy that the damage was minimal compared to how bad it could have been. However, this is when it dawned on me that I can't just stop; yes I'm so happy that I lost the 13lbs and went down in jean size however this is not where I want to be. I still want to lose another 10-12lbs, be able to be a size 10 in jeans/ fit into my Watch the Throne shirt and not to mention the other healthy goals I had. I honestly believe that I started to see other bloggers maintaining or just losing motivation that I kind of was like you know what I feel the same way especially how crazy my life had become. I"m in no way blaming my lack of motivation on them I just started to relate to them and ::Kanye shrugged:: this lifestyle change.

Something else that was a reality check was "being an emotional eater" I have always been an emotional eater.. ALWAYS. Having a bad/stressful/want to celebrate day I always want comfort food- usually chinese food. And yesterday was no different. I had a bad afternoon and was motivated all day to work out even printed out a workout and then shit hit the fan I skipped the gym and went straight to buy chinese food. I don't know if I can ever become a non-emotional eater but I know that right now- with everything going on in my life I DO NOT LIKE IT. This is something I'm going to work on in the next couple months as stress levels will be higher with my sister's wedding and the holidays.


Now that I can pin point the problem .. what are my SOLUTIONS.

1. I have to blog 2-3 times a week. NO EXCEPTION. I started this blog for accountability and I need to stick to it because it did help for the first 13lbs.
2. NO more processed food! I have to go back to planning/cooking all my meals!
3. Continue running but add circuit training.

With ALL of that being said.. HAPPY WEDNESDAY!

Thursday Updates!!!

Quick & to the point update! I was suppose to do a social run with Charm City Run- it is every Wednesday and they run between 2-7 miles with various speeds and after everyone goes out for a drink. I WAS SO EXCITED TO DO IT- I have new sneakers, I feel good and wanted to meet new people! But I went on two runs since I got the sneakers and they still need to be broken in... SO I chickened out and didn't go!

I didn't want my sneakers to slow me down/I was intimidated/I need more time- hopefully I have the guts to go next week! 

Since my mishaps at the grocery store - I was not able to find sweet potatoes but was able to get some stuff to get me back into the groove. & actually packed my breakfast and lunch today! 

Breakfast: eggs with grapes and blueberries
Lunch: chicken breast/ 1 red potato/ cucumber & tomato/ black beans

Even though they aren't  the HEALTHIEST meals it is nice to prepare and know exactly what I'm eating! Leaving to Jersey tomorrow for the Giants vs Jets game! sooo excited! going to eat so crappy! maybe time to end the summer with a detox :)

Do I only blog on Mondays???

I really need to get back into the swing of things & blogging is one of them! I have been eating pretty crappy and running here & there. I'm starting to feel gross and just blah! & I know I can't expect change UNLESS I CHANGE. It is one of those moments where I know what I need to do but still not doing it! I did however have a "okay time to snap out of it/back into the lifestyle!" moment. Yes that meatball sub & fries was AMAZING yesterday but how gross I felt last night was NOT and that is what I need to remember. 

Last night after my run- first one I did that I didn't keep time/miles for; I just wanted to run so it was about 30 mins so I'm assuming a little over 2 miles; I went grocery shopping! And of course I was trying to plan out my meals & had an idea of what I wanted to eat this week & of course the grocery store was an EPIC FAIL. They didn't have sweet potatoes, good looking veggies or anything I was planning on getting. I managed to get apples/water/ beans/candle/cottage cheese, so today I have to try again at another grocery store. 

This weekend I did go to my first running store! & the happiness I felt while I was there was amazing! I knew I needed new sneakers because the ones I had before were really starting to hurt when I went for longer runs. Charm City Run - for any Maryland people is amazing! They first had me walk to see what my need was and I'm an overpronator meaning 

this is what happens when I run

After he saw that he brought out a pair of sneakers that would help and had me get on the treadmill and recorded me running. He was able to slow it down and really see if the sneakers were fixing the problem- and it did. The sneakers I originally had do not support for overpronation and lead to knee problems! AHA!!! IT EXPLAINS MY KNEE PROBLEM!  After he saw what I needed and he brought out more options! Of course I'm a little vain and wanted something cute. 

Decided on these babies!! 

First run in them was pretty good! still have to get use to them but better than my last pair! 

Happy Lunes! Wish my luck at the second grocery store today

12 Week Weight Loss Challenge

I'm always looking for blogs to follow- people to motivate me or just someone who is on the same struggle bus. Well yesterday I found Caitlin who just started a  12 Week Weight Loss Challenge. Basically from June 20 until September 20 she will post 3 mini goals for the week (posting on Friday). The mini goals are designed to help you reach your ultimate 3 main goals that you want to achieve by the end of the 12 weeks! Even though I have my own goal list it pretty much supports what I want to do, so why not! Technically I'm late to the party but that isn't stopping me!

Week 1: 

1. Identify three weight loss-related goals you'd like to achieve or work towards in the next twelve weeks -

                    i. Run 5K less than 45mins 

                    ii. Eating little/no white grains (white bread/white rice/processed sugar)  

                    iii. See the 170's- I don't care if on September 20 I see 179lbs I will be HAPPY! 

1. Drink 2L of water/day! Staying hydrated is important! {definitely need to keep track of this}
2. Get 30 min. of activity/day- {altering this to a full workout 5-6 days a week} 

Week 2:

1. Ditch the scale. {So I have been thinking about doing this! But it is going to be hard not to weight myself. My goal is to do it twice a month- mid point and end of the month}
2. Create an inspiration Wordle! {couldn't make a wordle just yet but looking for more realistic motivation on Twitter/Instagram this week}
3. Track my food every day. {I use MyFitnessPal and have gotten better but slacked off last week, so going hard this week}

Overall, I"m on the right tract this will just help the weeks be a little bit more focused! Join me on this 12 week challenge and if you don't have a blog just comment your experience !!

Monthly Realization

Even though it is the second week of July it is being treated as if it was the first week! The main reason is because it was a bust of a week! I drove to New Jersey on Wednesday driving back on Friday morning to go straight to work. I didn't work out at all and ate overall crappy (yet delicious) . Thankfully I ended Sunday on a great note- home-cooked dinner (steak, sweet potato and broccoli)  made my Ashley which was amazing and healthy at the same time! 

For breakfast this morning I decided to try a new green smoothie!! yipieeeeeeee 

Ignore the no make up face

Found this great post on Pinterest on how to create your own green smoothie. So today I did 

2 cups of spinach

1 cup of pineapple 

1/2 of a cucumber

1 cup of almond milk  

& a serving of Herbalife protein

And it was pretty good- a little excited to try other combinations!! 

Now to my realization! I have a long way to go! I have 16lbs I want to lose by the end of the summer and another 10-15lbs by December! So I don't have a lot of room for messy weeks/weekends. I have said it before (my last post) that I get so happy that I'm like wooohooo bring on that bread! But the reality is 4lbs is great confidence boost but still a long way to go. Going home for the day and half was great because some of my family members really noticed my weight loss- everyone kept asking how many pounds I have lost but decided that I will keep that to myself until I'm ready to share and everyone was assuming way more than I have actually lost so why spoil it ha. 

Last month I focused a lot on changing/bettering my eating habits. This month is all about working out! I will really work out.. not a semi hard elliptical session but really putting in work for cardio and weights! As well as starting boot camp! I'm hoping that is going to help with ending the month with a BANG! 

Monday, Monday, Monday!

This is Monday of all Monday like "the holy grail of all diet/exercise program starting days" as Amber put it on Friday.

It is Monday July 1st AND 6 months away from New Year's Day. I couldn't imagine a better day to get on any goal you may have!! For me this is a perfect day because while I was on cloud 9 last week due to the progress I had seen and people starting to notice it on my face I decided to EAT BREAD! Not just one roll.. oh no that would be be too good for me.. I ate bread 4 times this week.. white french/Italian bread.. and LOVED EVERY MINUTE

Just picture me like that with bread and butter/beans 

I also was not able to workout this week at all.. so now I was terrified to get on the scale this morning & Ashley suggested I shouldn't since I was feeling so great and the scale might ruin that- even tried on clothes from Banana Republic (side job) that were a size 14 & XL (XL was too big) I was too hype that day!

But anywho I did weight myself and I didn't gain all 4lbs in 1 week so horrahhhhhhh I'm still doing okay! 

And actually had to do my 1 month check in and the results were amazing! People don't lie when the say the scale may not move too much but the real test is clothes and measurements. 

In total lost 4lbs. and 4 inches throughout !! 

	May 25, 2013	June 25, 2013	July 25, 2013	August 25, 2013
Weight	195.6 lbs	191.6 lbs
Left Arm	13in	13.5in
Right Arm	14in	13.5in
Waist	38.5in	37 in.
Belly Button	41.5in	40in
Hips	44.5in	44.5in
Left Leg	26in	25.5in
Right Leg	25in	25in

Friday Reflection

A rainy Friday definitely makes me more pensive than usual. This morning's topic:  Am I happy with the progress of this week? No.  

I don't even know where to start but I don't feel like I have been giving this "lifestyle change/healthy lifestyle" my 110%. There have been times when I think that I just didn't make the healthier decision. When I say that I mean that instead of eating some fruit in between jobs on Wednesday I decided to buy sweet potato fries & 4 piece nuggets from Burger King instead. I told myself that I would only eat half the order of small fries and still have to work at Banana Rep. for 3 hours so it balances out. I still put that snack into the MyFitnessPal app and I was still inside my 1200 calorie budget, however seconds after I took my last bite I went on Instagram and saw all of my healthy/fitness or people just working on losing weight putting up encouraging pictures, healthy recipes , etc. and I felt like CRAP!!! I become very hard on myself when I have weak moments like that because when will the cycle stop. It is a "small" meal now but then it snowballs into an actual meal then a weekend then finally an entire week and I'm back at square one.

I know that I shouldn't be this hard on myself but I want to be honest with how I'm feeling during this process, which brings me into my next emotional vent. I'm so use to craving everything. Everyone I'm close to knows that when I crave something it won't stop until I get it. It can be anything and everything from Red Lobster cheddar biscuits to a strawberry milkshake (my most recent cravings). And now that I'm trying to eat better my cravings have gotten even more crazy!

I want to believe that it is mental and I need to overcome this, just like an AAA person deals with craving alcohol. I think they say once you get to Week 4 it becomes habit and don't get cravings as much, so ending Week 2, lets hope it gets better!


 A co-worker is being bitchy about this eating healthy and being more active; Amanda and I are being vocal to have even more accountability at work and our manager Renee is very health conscious so she has given us some advice; however this co-worker is just so negative and says lil side comments about what she does (mind you she drinks a can of Coca Cola in every meal- clearly not someone I want to take advice from) and will either tempt us or tell us these cravings are just because we are depriving ourselves. I have so many people rooting me on but that one Negative Nancy is the one that I hear the loudest! I found the first person that wants to see me fail (I'm sure she doesn't but feels like it). Haters are Motivators ha

I want to be proactive about these cravings and really get other options so thanks to Pinterest I found this!

 

Definitely going grocery shopping to buy some of these items as well as trying a Pinterest recipe this week!!! If anyone has any suggestions on what I should do so I won't think about cutting corners or how to deal with cravings or anything really it would be awesome!! 

NO REGRETS

This one is short & simple!

We had a cookie cake for work today.. & I ate a slice... .& have no regrets!!



 I don't want to feel guilty or feel like it was my cheat for the day or a reward of some kind.

1. I'm not a dog and don't need a reward for having a couple of healthy days
2. IT HAS ONLY BEEN A FEW DAYS!

I had it, I enjoyed it, I'm moving on. I"m not having another piece. I'm also drinking a tall glass of water now and doing a longer walk today.

I know it is silly to make a post about this but I don't want to snowball into eating another slice or convincing Ashley when I get home to buy take out but most importantly I don't want  internalize any guilt. I want to own my slip and keep it moving!!!

#noExcuses #eyeontheprize

So I'm starting off this week SUPER motivated! This weekend was shaky not going to lie, however we went grocery shopping yesterday and wooo what a stock fridge can do! They always say don't want to eat crappy food.. don't keep it in your house and that is exactly what we did.

Then later that evening my good friend Joyce tweeted "When you reeaalllllyyyyy want something you make it happen. #NoExcuses"  and that really just got me going and excited about today! 

My coworker Amanda is awesome; she really wants me to meet my goals so she is helping me out as well as improving her healthy lifestyle on the way. She bought us 2 notebooks where we will note everything we eat and let the other person see it. The idea is that we have someone that can make us accountable everyday. I also use  MyFitnessPal ( I haven't used it in over 2 months but I"m back on it) this app basically calorie counts so you put in all your meals and it will let you know your calorie intake, I'm currently only eating 1,200 calories a day- which is low but needed something low to get the pounds rolling off. 

Amanda and I are also walking after work twice a week. Now I can technically just start going back to the gym- since i'm paying for it and haven't gone in 2 months, however, I don't want to overwhelm my body with a change in diet and more activity all at once. I want to gradually add it in so I will less likely give it all up. So even though I want to go to the gym on the other days of the week I'm going to add days in the next couple of weeks. 

Week 1- 2 days of walking 
Week 2- 2 days of walking; 1 day of gym 
Week 3- 2 days of walking; 2 days of gym 

*This also is tentative since I work at Banana Republic some nights & weekends, but you get the point. 

I also have 22 days until my first check in point so #noExcuses #eyeontheprize

TGIT (Thank God Its Tuesday?)

 Finally the weekend is over.. and I'm kind of glad !! This weekend was not a complete train wreck however I did hit bumpy bumpy roads but did have an AHA moment (my Oprah reference).

I left work Friday anxious (see previous post) because I knew we were going over to a friend's house and there was going to be booze and junk food -BAD! plus a brunch on Saturday - extra bad!! However I started off okay, I split some dinner with Ashley and we left to meet up with everyone. At the actual bonfire I had a small helping of buffalo dip & chips and later that night when everyone was feeling their drinks they started to make pizza bagels & pretzels and I was able to resist only eating 1 mini pizza bagel and a bite of a pretzel and called it a night. When we got to brunch the next morning I quickly realized that this place had NOTHING healthy- I'm telling you everything on the menu sounded delicious and everything I shouldn't be eating! But I did not panic and just went with it - rationalizing that it was early in the day and since we had to pack & move I surely would burn the calories. I ended Saturday without burning brunch calories but eating a small helping gnocchi with a salad.

Now here comes Sunday & Monday- it included Chinese food (chicken& broccoli with white rice- YES ate the whole combo plate ) Ritas; Monday- 1/2 Club Turkey Sandwich (mayo, bacon & white bread included) and  coffee oreo milkshake. So basically I ate "bad" food all weekend probably the only thing missing was fries!
 

 I'm  trying to lose weight but I'm also trying to be nicer to myself. I went to counseling last year to deal with my weight and other stuff that came up. And in those meetings my counselor would always say the way I "encourage" myself is very mean and hurtful and usually doesn't get me anywhere. So that is also an area i'm trying to improve in.

With that being said I am cutting myself some slack for this weekend but also reflecting on why I didn't say no to at least the milkshake or any other of the social meals. I think all my life I have been the "funny fat girl or knowing Rudy she would say "you aint funny"so just the fat friend and even though my close friends wouldn't describe me as that- that is how I see it.

I also feel very self conscious about saying hey guys I'm on a diet or hey guys I should not eat that because it is embarrassing to admit that I am not happy  where I am and I hate those people who shove healthy food down everyone's throat or everything about what they are eating is about their diet so its easier just to eat  x,y,z then speak up. But from the guilt I felt last night & all day today because I knew I had to write a post I think slowly I will just start internally saying no to certain food without making a fuss. As well as whispering it to people that I should not eat certain things because I know the people who are rooting for me don't want me to give into temptation.

So yes moderation is great and everyone will preach how "Gigi that was fine you can have a milkshake every once in awhile" but unfortunately I"m not there! I"m at the stage where I need discipline to say no because I easily snowball into an entire week of bad eating and rationalize with myself how I can start next Monday or the next one and then I gained another 10 lbs. I need the straight and narrow for at least a month so becomes good habits.

Pretty accurate  



Any who! Happy Tuesday! this post is a sigh a relief because now I can keep it moving

Long Weekend Ahead

So this post is going to be short & to the point.. weekends are the WORST for me! I think food is that much more delicious between Friday and Sunday not to mention this Monday is a holiday. On any other weekend I would be so excited to order out tonight and go out to eat Saturday & sometimes Sunday to then recover on Monday, however this cycle has to end. Realistically I'm not going to stay home until all the weight is off- I have to learn how to eat out the healthy way.

It does give me some anxiety thinking about it because even this week trying to stay on the straight and narrow has been hard.. I have given into a piece a chocolate yesterday & a milkshake on Tuesday (it was strawberry so that is considered a fruit serving right? ha) and a breakfast wrap this morning. I did however have some success I did chose to have Subway (turkey no cheese very little lite mayo on wheat) for lunch & homemade very healthy salads the rest of the week as well as a healthy smoothie last night- so overall I have been semi okay with this weeks food decisions. I know the biggest thing for me is to get back on MyFitnessPal so I can really monitor what I'm eating and my calorie in take, however it is annoying to track EVERYTHING YOU EAT and put it on an app but I think this has to be done!

I will be going to brunch with some Lange Ladies tomorrow & we are hanging out tonight as well so this is my first test, making an 100% effort to say yes to healthier options!!! egg whites, veggies & all that good stuff (gif is too funny LOL)



Also yesterday I decided to tell my close friends (Lange Ladies) about the blog. The more people that know the less likely I will give up! & they reacted very positive and encouraging which made me feel AMAZING!!

Ending this Friday post with some anxiety but really pumped to kick some ass!! (aka not eat junk)